Swords, Tonfas and Hitmen, Oh My!
by karrot bear
Summary: Tsuna Sawada and his dog Toto have been flung into the magical world of Mafialand. With belligerent munchkins, silver gloves and a demented cross-dressing witch, will Tsuna ever get home?
1. Chapter 1

'_Tsu-kun, could you go pick up some groceries?'_

'_But, Kaa-san it looks really windy out there-'_

'_Yes I know but we need it for dinner, if you hurry you should be fine.'_

'_Bu-'_

'_Bark.'_

'_See, Tutor will go with you, just hurry.'_

Tsuna sighed remembering the previous exchange. Some groceries for dinner turned into enough food to feed a small third world country. Not only finding but carrying everything was really starting to tire him out. Having little stick arms didn't help. It really didn't help that his dog Tutor, affectionately called Toto, just followed him with a strange doggy smirk. Another gust of wind hit the small boy and made him drop just about everything. This was third time it happened. As Tsuna scrambled to save the food, again, Toto doggy frowned at the sky then started ahead of his 'master'.

'Eh, Toto! Don't just run ahead! Toto! Ah, not again.' Tsuna cried as he once more dropped the food.

* * *

By the time that Tsuna reached his house it had begun to rain and the wind had picked even more. When entering the house, however, he couldn't help notice that the TV had been left on the weather channel and blaring that cheesy chime music. More importantly, his mother was missing. A note was left in her place.

_Helping Hanekawa-san  
Please put groceries in fridge  
Be back soon_

Kaa-san is just too nice. Tsuna shuddered thinking of old lady Hanekawa yelling at him and his 'rat haired little pest' when walking to school.

Flash

'Hiiii! Oh god, the power went out. Why is this happening?!'

Toto rolled his eyes at Tsuna's lamenting who continued to shout 'Hiii' whenever a crack of thunder or flash of lightening happened, until finally said boy was huddled in fetal position under the kitchen table freaking out.

Tsuna does not like thunderstorms.

Tsuna especially does not like thunderstorms when the power is out, his mother is taking care of an old hag and his dog is acting like a sadist(well not really acting he _is_ one).

In fact Tsuna doesn't like when his house starts moving because of the storm.

'Oh DEAR GOD! What's HAPPENING? Why me?!'

Tsuna was shouting hysterically, he is good at that, and Toto kicked him in the head not really liking the noise level. This quieted him down to pathetic whimperings.

About ten minutes later of flying furniture, freaked out Tsunas and annoyed Totos there was loud crash followed by silence.

'Um have we finally stopped?'

Poking out of his huddle Tsuna noticed that the light coming in wasn't gray from the storm but clear with blue sky. Stepping out of the house he couldn't breathe. The scenery was, well, _magical_. Bouncy green grass, flowers made out of sugar and blown glass and fluffy clouds lazily floating in the sky. Which spread to cover everything in sight. It was breath taking which was why Tsuna turned blue and finally remembered to breathe.

'Toto, we are definitely not in Namimori anymore.'

'Hmmm, no. And my name is Reborn. Tutor if you must. Toto is just insulting.'

'Hiii! Who are you?!'

Because exiting the crash-landed Sawada residence was a tall, thin man dressed in a sharp black suit and fedora with freaky looking sideburns. He seemed to find Tsuna's reaction fairly amusing because he smirked, little did Tsuna know this basically was his expression to everything.

'But aren't you supposed to be a dog? Wh-why are you a human? And what's with the suit?'

'I'm technically supposed to be human. You should be asking why I was dog and I wear the suit because it looks good.'

Tsuna fell to his knees. Th-this man was terrible.

Reborn meanwhile strolled around, hands in pockets, observing Tsuna and his surroundings till well...

* * *

'Oh dear, it seems you've killed Nono.'

Tsuna looked up and finally noticed the elderly man his house had squished.

'OH DEAR GOD! I've murdered an old man! I'm going to go to jail. I'll never survive, they'll eat me alive and-'

Reborn, thoroughly fed up, kicked him in the head.

Good thing Tsuna was already on the ground.

'Shut up Dame-Tsuna. These things happen.'

'Houses don't land on people and kill people! That doesn't happen! And…Wait you know him?'

Reborn frowned. Took him long enough to notice.

'He was the head of a mafia family to the East. I used to work for him.'

'Oh... Oh god they're going to kill me! I've killed a mafia boss!'

Kick to the face once more.

'Yes Dame-Tsuna you've killed a mafia boss and because of mafia law [1] you now are the new head his family.'

This was said rather nonchalantly.

'But I want to go home.'

Reborn ignored this comment and went on.

'You might have some trouble. You'll need a family and-'

'But I want to go home!'

Reborn cocked his eyebrow. This was going to be challenge.

'Well Dame-Tsuna to get home, you'll have to talk to the Wizard. There will be many dangerous challenges especially since you wear those now.'

Tsuna followed Reborn's gaze to his hands which were now sporting dazzling silver gloves [2]. Those definitely weren't there before.

Tsuna proceeded to freak. Reborn sighed and face palmed. This was going to be a difficult job. But as always Reborn had a plan. An evil smirk grew on his face and the taller man started walking away leaving Tsuna to desperately pry the gloves off.

'Come on Dame-Tsuna, I'll explain about the gloves later. And don't take them off.'

Tsuna froze and sweat dropped.

'Hurry up Dame-Tsuna. If you want to find the Wizard you'll have to find the Sky road.'

'Huh? Hiiii, wait up Reborn! REBORN!'

* * *

[1] mafia law- made it up. Needed to explain why Tsuna now had the gloves. If there is one please tell me.

[2] silver gloves- in the original Wizard of OZ Dorothy had silver slippers. Besides silver looks better on Tsuna.

Sorry, it was so slow. It is an intro chap.

First ever non-drabble so please review and stuff. I need all the help I can get!

Oh and I'll be taking references from the Wizard of OZ book, movie and some TinMan.


	2. Chapter 2

Hello minor notes, this story :

may or may not have pairings and may or may not be continued anymore, it honestly is dependant on how I feel...suck it up I guess

* * *

'HII! REBORN! Wait up!'

Tsuna tried desperately to catch up to the thin man who seemed immune to the various branches and brambles. Apparently finding the Sky Road meant they had to walk through a Godforsaken forest.

'Dame-Tsuna it's not my fault you can't walk.' But the hitman at least paused slightly only then to quicken his pace.

'R-Reborn, what is the Sky Road?'

'Hmm? It's the main road for this world. It'll lead you to the wizard.'

Pause. Why did he need a wizard. Frankly it sounded like something from a roleplaying game.

'The wizard can help you get home. That is if you want to get home.'

'Hii! I want to go home!'

Reborn sighed. Was this kid really serious?

Kick.

'Don't act like such a baby Dame-Tsuna.'

Leaving the concussion prone lad he lifted up a few branches and mentally swore. He thought his sense of direction was better than this but then again, glancing back at his student he shrugged. This was what training was about.

* * *

'Boss.'

'What trash?'

'Nono was killed.'

The scarred figure jerked up. His glare shriveling anything it gazed upon except for the messenger who looked fairly pissed himself.

'Who has the gloves?'

'Some kid.'

Oops. Wrong thing to say thought said messenger as several alcoholic beverages were aimed for his face.

Goddammit hadn't he ever heard don't shoot the messenger?!

* * *

'Something wrong?'

Tsuna had finally gotten over his pleasurable meeting with the ground and noticed his self-proclaimed teacher staring off at something.

'Reborn?'

Wave in front of the face.

Nothing.

'Reborn?!'

Snore bubble.

Collapse to the ground in disbelief. What the hell was this guy?

'VOIII! THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE BRAT?!!!'

Tsuna jumped and looked around. Where did that come from. Pulling on Reborn's sleeve he tried to drag the much heavier man away from the frightening voice.

'VOIII! I'M FUCKING TALKING TO YOU!'

'E-excuse me?'

'UP HERE DUMBASS!'

* * *

Lo and behold up in the tree was some one most people would call Squalo. 'Cept he was about a foot tall and chibi-fied. His sword had been shrunk down to about toothpick size however his hair seemed to be longer than ever. Not that Tsuna knew any of this. No, he thought there was some deranged toddler up in the tree trying to be Tarzan with a sailor's mouth.

Tsuna in response nervously chuckled. How cute.

Wrong thing to do because as stated earlier Tsuna didn't know the background information concerning him. So how was he to know that only a few weeks ago the Boss of the East had placed a spell on his disloyal assassins and that they had been shrunk down to huggable plushie size. The Varia were now seen as bad-mouthed munchkins and they weren't exactly happy with that. In fact when news had reached them Nono had died they had gotten better, they were estactic. No more curse! Then when it became apparent that the silver gloves were needed to lift it they became less than cheerful. Bummer.

* * *

'VOII!!! YOU'LL PAY FOR THAT KID!!!'

Jumping down like a little spider monkey Squalo grabbed our protagonist and pulled him down to earth. Only then did he notice the silver glow.

'VOII! BOSS I FOUND HIM!!'

Our little Tsuna was then dragged away by the belligerent sword weilding munchkin.

'REBOORN!'

* * *

Variaville also known as New Munchkinville was not exactly the happiest place on earth. Sure the streets were filled with candy and flowers but that was all a side effect of the curse. The little chibis drinking, smoking and gambling sort of ruined the mood.

Nonetheless Tsuna was still tied up in town square with the seven main members of Variaville poking and prodding him.

'U shi shi~ So this is the kid?'

'Senpai why else would he be here? You really are stupid.'

'Hey! Don't insult your senpai uncute kouhai!'

A chibi with several umbrellas prodded him.

'Huh.'

'Oooh! Isn't he adorable Levi?'

'Sure.'

'VOII! ALL OF YOU SHUT UP!'

'Mu~ why was I called out?'

Mammon had actually been munchkin size, ever since he had joined. Why he would never tell but the curse didn't seem to effect him, in fact he was now back to his original self with one minor drawback of not being able to use any of his powers. He was still pretty bitter about this. Damn Nono and his precautions.

'Shut up trash.'

All everyone quieted down with the exception of Mammon who wandered off not really caring where this went.

Tsuna, mean while, flinched. Even as a chibi this man was scary.

'Trash why do you have those? They belong to me.'

'I-I don't know. Reborn never told me.'

Silence as everyone took this in. He was with Reborn?

'That bastard, give me those they're mine.'

Chibi Xanxus was getting angry.

'I would but they won't come off.'

A long silence as everyone took some more time to process this information. This was just getting better and better.

'Bark.'

'T-TOTO!'

The little black dog a.k.a. Reborn had showed up to the rescue!

Or not as the dog stopped and sat near Xanxus. Apparently he still didn't like the nickname.

'W-what are you going to do?'

'Well those damn gloves have accepted you. So the only way to get 'em off is-'

Everyone made a 'snick' motion across their throats.

* * *

Oh god I'm going to die!

Tsuna watched as they menacingly creeped closer, Reborn in the background blankly watching.

Pop. Pop. Pop.

'The hell?'

'Ooh bubbles! They're simply darling!'

POP!

A giant bubble swarm had come out of nowhere and popped leaving a teenager with light brown hair coughing his lungs out.

He stood up, brushing off his pink dress, eyes alarmingly lit up when seeing Tsuna tied up about to be sent through assassin hell.

'Sawada-dono! Thank goodness thy is safe.'

The boy came up and using his oddly shaped wand/blade cut the ropes.

Turning sharply to the assassins he began his long lecture about not hurting innocent people.

'Varia-dono how many times must thy do this? The gloves' magic has accepted Sawada-dono as the next in line, please leave him be.'

The small chibis glared up the crossdresser except of course Lussuria. Darling that dress is adorable!

'Really trash what you going to fuc-'

Pop.

'VOII!! BOSS!'

'Really, I warned thee.'

* * *

Cliff hanger cause I'm tired, please forgive me.

I honestly thought this story was lost I couldn't bring myself to write anymore but apparently I still have some juice for it...by the way Basil is not demented, that would be the West Witch....

The review button is eating toast. Don't you want toast?

* * *


	3. Chapter 3

recap:

If you need one go back and read the last chapter...

* * *

Chibi Xanxus glared down at the world. Now usually chibi people can't glare down on anything except maybe a little daisy but at the moment Xanxus was now enveloped in a pink bubble courtesy of Basil the Good Subordinate of the North.

'Now really Xanxus-dono, if thou had listened this would never have to happen.'

'Trash let me fucking outta here.'

'I greatly apologize but I cannot. Thou would only threaten Sawada-dono again.'

'VOII! YOU HEARD BOSS LET 'IM OUT!'

Basil turned away from the silver haired munchkin, completely ignoring him and focused his attention on the shaking boy.

'Sawada-dono is thou alright?'

'Ah yes I'm fine.'

_Wait no! I'm not ok! I want to go back home!!!_

But Tsuna couldn't say that to a total stranger. More likely he couldn't that to a person that magically appears in the form of bubbles and floofy pink dresses. Especially one of the same gender.

'Uh, actually have to go somewhere.'

_Slip away, slip away. These people are not good!_

'Sawada-dono thou looks pale.'

* * *

The small dog disappeared in the commotion caused by the arrival of bubbles. Turning a corner he came across a small alley that seemed to be covered with mist. Entering, the dog no longer a dog, smirked. So he was hiding here.

'Viper.'

The small androgynous illusionist came out from behind the dumpster looking somewhat tired.

'What do you need Reborn?'

'Just some information. Oh and a small favor.'

'Mu~ You should know by now those things aren't cheap.'

The hitman chuckled and pulled out a wallet.

'Same as ever. How much?'

'Your story.'

Black eyes met hood as the hitman slowly replaced his wallet with a gun. Glancing out of the alley he swiftly faced his shorter counterpart.

'Fine. Looks like we're going to be here a while. You know the rules, I go first. What happened?'

* * *

Tsuna stared down at the tea cup. It was piping hot and complimented with biscuits. A certain green mohawked individual was patiently watching him eat nodding whenever he took a bite, obviously ecstatic to have company that didn't get wicked-ass drunk.

'Ah thank you. But please Basil-san could you explain everything once more?'

The crossdresser nodded, placing his cup down provided of course by Lussuria who had completely fallen for his dress.

'Well after thy house crushed Nono-dono, thou obtained the gloves. The gloves only accept the next ruler of the Vongola family, a prominent family of the East. Now from what thy has explained thou is not from this world and as such wishes to get home.'

'Yes.'

'Sadly the only person who knows about other worlds and hopefully thou's, is the Wizard.'

Nod.

'When thou reaches him thy should be able to travel home, but...Sawada-dono! Please we need thou! Someone has to lead the Vongola and the family heirloom has chosen thee! Please accept it!'

Tsuna shook his head not wanting to make eye-contact with the pleading boy. He had tried the same tactic earlier, explaining who to go to then trying to guilt trip him.

'Bark.'

All heads turned as the small dog came in and jumped up next to Tsuna.

'R-Reborn! You left me!'

'Bark.'

'Ah Reborn-dono, its a great honor to meet thee.'

Dog nodded towards him and almost gave him a wink before grabbing Tsuna's sleeve and dragging him out of the room.

What was that about?

'Mu~ North child, come here.'

'EH?'

Mammon had showed up once more with frustration waves in the background.

'Ah yes Viper-dono.'

* * *

_'Just tell Basil I'm taking care of it.'_

_'Why?'_

_Smirking the hitman aimed his gun._

_'I paid.'_

_The hooded man frowned. Damn him._

_'What if he asks?'_

_'Lets just say to get to the Wizard one must have the wits of a boss and the strength of a family.'_

_And with that the man slunk back into the mist his shadow becoming much smaller in too short of amount of time, leaving the other to glare and curse himself for not being able to see the trick._

* * *

'Reborn, why were you a dog again?'

'Seems like I can change when I want too.'

_That wasn't my question._

Giving him a sideways glance Tsuna decided to drop it. This guy seemed to only give out information when he wanted to and even then it was convuluted.

'Why did the Varia show us the way?'

Variaville in fact was a starter for the Sky Road and after releasing a pretty pissed Xanxus from hios bubble they had more than happily booted Tsuna back on track. Though prying Lussuria off his leg did take some time._ Darling don't go! the world is too cruel for someone as adorable as you!_

'Family.'

Quizzically looking at him, Tsuna shivered. He really did not want to believe he was a blood relation to any of them. Seriously could you imagine that reunion?

'Not all families are in blood. You are now the ruler of the Vongola which means you're all connected.'

This guy is way too serious.

'But I want to go home.'

Kick to the head.

'Repeating the same thing over and over will get you nothing. Besides to get home you need a family yourself.'

Wincing Tsuna sat up, rubbing his head as Reborn nonchalantly continued forward.

'Come on Dame-Tsuna, you need to travel to at least the cornfields by nightfall.'

* * *

Cornfield tactics 101

-Don't get lost

-Wear proper protection(no not that type pervs!)

-Do not steal from angry old farmers

-Stay away from wild life

-Absolutely NO! Talking to the scarecrow

These were posted on a small fence by the edge of the field as warning from the townsfolk. You see the cornfields were a source of income for many of them, crops and trading were big. However it could be a punishment or to some a relief. The forementioned scarecrow was in a fact one of the local boys. From a small age he showed great promise in swordsmanship, a great asset for the townsfolk. Now they didn't have to hire caravan guards except for one tiny problem. He didn't obey the rules.

He got lost and when found would just laugh.

He didn't wear protection and would come back with long, thin and deep cuts. He also would just laugh.

He wouldn't steal, but not doing your work is just as good as stealing. When confronted he would laugh, again.

He would fratenize with crows for God's sake! They're fun guys he would say.

Suffice to say, he was an idiot.

So he became a scarecrow. His shift was from dawn to dawn, no rest for idiotic his father would say. Even if he wasn't exactly the best scarecrow it still kept him out of the townsfolk hair. Because of that he wasn't allowed to talk to strangers. Especially if it was child services.

* * *

'Reborn, we're at the cornfieids could we stop?'

Tsuna was tired. Very tired.

He spent the last few hours walking to the French Foreign Legion motto 'march or die'.

It wasn't the most inspirational slogan but it worked his legs.

'Yeah you should stop, its bad to walk for long times without stretching.'

Tsuna froze. What was that voice?

Head kick.

'Dame-TSuna keep moving.'

'But Rebo-'

'Maa, you guys are funny.'

'R-Reborn! THere's someone up there!'

'Yo! What's up?'

'Ciaossu.'

'Gyaah!'

Out of the three Tsuna seemed the most freaked out by a living scarecrow. The other youth, however, grinned and waved obviously not finding the situation strange at all.

'What are you guys doing here?'

'W-we're going to the-'

'We're playing a game.'

The boy perked up. A game? Those were fun! Alas he was also a bit of a simpleton.

'Really? What is it?'

'MAfia goes to the Wizard.'

'Maa never heard of it but sounds fun!'

TSuna watched the conversation from afar trying not to believe that a person would actually fall for that crap but that look on his face screamed idiot.

'Dame-Tsuna.'

Snapped back into reality Tsuna looked around before focusing on Reborn.

'Ah yes?'

'Make this man part of your famiglia.'

'That part of the game?'

Turning back to the spiky haired boy he nodded which in turn got him a grin.

''B-but Reborn-'

Kick.

'S-sorry. I'm Tsuna nice to meet you.'

'Yamamoto Takeshi.'

And he hopped down from his post and pulled our befuddled little Mafia boss off the ground.

'So what now?'

_That's exactly what I want to know._

* * *

Meh....I can't write Yamamoto worth anything........sigh that's a big problem since he's a main character...

The witch of the west was supposed to show but you got a badly written Yama...waaah! I'm so sorry! Please forgive me!

I need to write my book critique for English....

The review button is throwing Bel's knives at the authoress. Click to join.


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